Apr 20, 2025

8 small lessons to take from the superhit book ‘How to Win Friends and Influence People’

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Lessons from a classic

A classic book in the self-help genre, ‘How to Win Friends and Influence People’ by Dale Carnegie has been winning hearts since 1936! From gentle advice on how to make friends, to sure-shot tips on how to influence people, the book gives it all. Here are some tips from the book.

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Make people feel important

A lesson many people take from the book is that people wish to feel valued and important, and in order to win friends or influence them, you need to make them feel so. Respond to them, keep a tab on their life, update them with your own, and more.

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A smile is a helpful weapon

Although this sounds too ‘simple’, a smile works like a charm. Suppose you are in a company of people who are all invested in the story but also dozing off in between. Now if you smile and show genuine emotions during this time, the speaker will automatically feel heard.

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Use names

‘What’s in a name’ should not always be taken to its word, and it is important that you know people’s names and address them with it. It shows you know them well, and makes a good impression.

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Hear first to be heard

In order to be a people person, you need to be a good listener. Nobody likes a man who only speaks and does not listen. So engage with people, make them feel heard, and see how your life and circle transform.

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Public criticisms are a big NO

One of Carnegie’s strongest points is to avoid criticising people, especially in public. When you demean someone or put them in a small position in public, it will hurt your relationship with them.

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Take note of interests

When in a public setting, don’t go on blabbering about yourself, your interests, achievements, and more. Instead, take an interest in the person first.

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Admit your wrongs

Another small detail people miss even after reading the book is the power of admitting your mistakes. If you own up your mistakes and apologise for them, it shows maturity and honesty on your part.

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Avoid arguments

If you are in a new company and feel like the conversation is turning into an argument, walk away. Don't have a dramatic walkout, but just distance yourself from the topic.

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Thanks For Reading!

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